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Guns Out

by Dead Languages

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1.
We are young, we are hopeful, and we buy things when we can, and we're afraid...afraid of the future, but we're in love with the past. We think The Good Things never seem to last. We have cars and friends, addictions, and rent checks. and This time every year, I see new faces around here, and I can't stop thinkin' 'bout the things they're gonna see... but I'm too tired to care about the way things used to be, and too worried to wonder where my choices will lead. I spend half my time complaining, and the other half asleep, or sitting quiet in my room with my TV and at this time next year, I will not be living here, but I can't fight feeling like I'm going home too soon.
2.
Kleenex 02:21
3.
"Sorry." I'll never say it again unless it's true. This house was built to crumble over you. The brick and mortar store fronts, and the churches too. The room is quiet, so I'm turning on the news. The weekend wasted warriors are in bed, nursing bad decisions, holding bottles, clutching heads. There's someone in a basement probably wishing she was dead, but the movies make you forget all of that. "Oh, it's too nice to be inside," I heard her say, "but the window does just fine when you're away." and "Every minute feels like one step closer to the door, and I don't want to live here anymore."
4.
5.
On the day my city burns, I will sift through the ashes, picking up small shards of glass as the National Guard convoy passes. I will rise to my feet, and shift my gaze towards the street, and see you standing. I grew up half an hour north from where Czolgosz shot McKinley. September 6th, 1901. Two bullets to the belly. and I am thankful for the mall erected in his name, and the statue (high school). My great great grandfather worked hauling grain along the river. Now this city hungers and I have nothing to give her, save a few kind words, and a rare ocean bird (http://buffalonews.com/2013/10/09/buffalo-bird-watchers-abuzz-over-brown-booby/), and a song like this one. On the day my city burns, I will stand out on the break water, watching black smoke fill the air and cover up the slaughter, and I will call out your name, but my voice won't sound the same, and they won't hear me.
6.
There's something about this house that keeps me locked inside my mind where you could never hope to find me. Cut out my eyes and gag me and bind me. There's something about this town that holds me tighter than a bind between a best friend or a family. It kicks my stomach and tries to choke me. There's something about the state of New York that makes me feel like I have something to live for. I have enough, but I guess I always want more. Someday I'll be taller than the tree in my backyard. Someday I'll be dead and have a flaming sword to stand guard. Bury me without a tie or a credit card. There's something about this house that holds me tighter than a bind between a best friend or a family. There's nothing else I'd rather have to slowly kill me.
7.
the weather was still hot and still nobody cares but i’ll write this sequel anyways i dragged my converse feet down Bay Street and craned my neck to see if my best friend dog was there to play with me oh how careless he dug into the earth while i felt about the same as that dirt and i thought… maybe it’s hopeless because i want it to be his eyes began to look sad as i got up to walk away i had nowhere to go but i knew i couldn’t stay and so i promised on the way home i’d swing back down his street because i need you more than you need me oh how fearless he stood up on two legs paws in hands, and snout to face and pound for pound or backbone length this shitty street is what you make and i guess i too would dig a hole all day
8.
Great Lakes 02:37
The great lakes. The heartache. The words I never have to say. The cold heat. The concrete. The rusty coast explained away. The snow drifts. Chapped lips. The storm that flooded half the basement. Headlights. Black ice. Tires screeching on the pavement. I hope to see you sometime soon, silhouetted by the moon. Fluorescent lighting, tile floors, private clubs with open doors. The sign reads I'm only 100 miles from my hometown. The billboards. The hard words. Dragging feet on dirty ground. Street lights. Black tights. Fuck those who say you had it coming. To burn out, Guns Out. I'm not alone, and I'm not running. I know your heart beats with mine, I feel you in my spine.
9.
Of Course 06:57

about

Written and recorded in Fall of 2013 and Spring of 2014. All songs by Dead Languages. "To the Kidnappers" originally appears on Songs from Bible Class by Dead Languages; additional guitar by Matt Stevens. Poem after "Of Course" is "Always/Zyanya" written and read by Ethan Shantie. Thanks to the people and places that inspired these songs.

"It's better to burn out than it is to rust."

credits

released March 21, 2014

Zach Sandecki- Guitar/Vocals
Matt Stevens- Guitar/Vocals

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about

Dead Languages Buffalo, New York

zach and matt.
not dead yet.
2023

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